Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Being Thankful For Boob Marbles!

I do apologize for not posting on any of my blogs as of late- you see, about a month ago I found a large lump on my left breast, and went into panic mode.

I hoped for the best, but planned for the worst. Sometimes it's a curse to have such a great imagination! The best scenario would be nothing was wrong, and I just had a boob marble or something stupid like that- whatever a boob marble is. I thought maybe I just banged it and had a bump that would go away. Eventually.

The worst scenario would be cancer- my dad had it (he adopted me, so it wouldn't have been hereditary), and our family went through hell both emotionally and financially. I swore I wouldn't do that to my family. I planned on writing letters to my kids for each of their birthdays as well as those special times like a first date, or driving the car, getting married and anything else I could think of. I wondered of I had that long to write all those letters to both of my kids, hoping I had enough time to bestow my words of wisdom on simple pages of printer paper. I thought of making a DVD as well, just so they would remember me as their mom who loved them very much. Just thinking of doing that made me cry!

But then I started thinking- did I want to leave this world sad and depressed? Did I want to go out angry? Neither seemed like the best way.

If God wanted me that bad, I figured I would go out laughing- being the positive person I think I am (please read the hidden irony). I had the funeral planned with me wearing a T-shirt that said "Shhh! I'm just sleeping!", and wanted to be buried next to my dad, whose headstone bore the single word meaning "male bovine bowel movement" (his favorite word in life). I still had no idea what to put on my own stone (though an arrow pointing to my dad's gravestone, bearing the words 'Yeah, what he said' was considered), but I knew it would have to make someone smile when they came to visit. That's how I intended on leaving this life, making people laugh as I made my way to heaven.

God had other plans. He used this as a wake-up call to get me back on track and back into Him. I admit that I haven't been the best I could be in His eyes, and we both knew it. But sometimes God has to be blunt to make a point, and making boob marbles is one way He does it. At least for me. I needed to sweat this out a little first.

This is what I have learned so far:

* I stopped putting off inviting people over because my house was messy.
* Both my husband and I made a list of people we wanted to invite to dinner, and will go down that list at least once a month.
* I am planning more lunch dates with friends. I'll no longer wait until I have the funds to go out- I can always invite them over to my messy house!
* Hug my kids and husband more often, and tell them that I love them. Every day, several times a day.
* Pray more. A lot more.
* People are more important than Facebook games.
* My husband and kids are more important than anybody on this earth.
And last but certainly not least:
* Be thankful to God for everything! Including boob marbles.

So please take these words to heart and accept my apology for not posting for so long!


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