I've been reading a book by the title of The Best Yes, by Lysa Turkeurst. I'm only half way through and I think she and I could be sisters.
She's as messed up as I am. Maybe she'll adopt me as her sister.
The best part of this book is that she admits that life as a Christian isn't the bed of roses, the bees knees, the shangri-la that secular people think we live in, once we find God. All it just proves is that we need God more than ever- but we have to spend time with Him every day.
I've been reading my bible almost every day. Sometimes I forget, and sometimes I want to put it off- but I know if I do, it will take me down a road of bad habits I don't want. And when I do read it, I feel better about God, my life, and how I'm living.
My infamous schedule, for instance. For weeks, months I've been tweaking this thing until I can squeeze out every second of time doing something useful. But all I've really accomplished is burning myself out and making myself into someone Oscar the Grouch would be proud of.
Then I got to the part in her book (right before I fell asleep on the pages) that asked if I was doing good work for me, or listening- really listening to God and doing what He wants?
Chapter Eight is Consider the Trade. Basically she writes that we have a decision to make. We had just an occasion come up last night.
I had been working my fanny off for the past few weeks, and we're almost current with the finances. A few more weeks and we might be able to start paying off a few debts, bit by bit. My husband wanted to spend some time with me, and suggested we go see a movie.
For those that don't know us, a movie is a rare treat. We see them maybe twice a year if we're lucky.
I really wanted to see a movie. I was worn, I worked hard, and I really wanted a break and spend time with my Schmoopsiepoo. If we scrimped and saved a week or two longer...maybe worked a few more hours...if, if, if...
Then it dawned on me. I was tired now. Was I prepared to work a few more extra hours for the next week or two? How would that effect my family, who was already seeing me come home in ogre mode?
Would this trip to the movies bless my family in the long run? No.
It killed me to tell him that. Truly! I wanted to go as much as he did, but in the end, I'd be making the wrong decision if we went. It was better to plan and put some money aside each week and go when we had enough. Then we could go guilt-free, and be blessed by the rare treat.
That was my Best Yes. And I felt a weight lifted because I don't have to do extra hours to 'make up' for playtime.
I also had to tweak my schedule concerning driving. Should I try to do thirty hours for the small bonus, or do the hours I'm comfortable with? Being comfortable is something I strive for, but not necessarily what God wants me to do. So I plotted my hours for the week and saw something interesting.
If I took just two more hours a day, that threw a monkey-wrench into my entire week! I needed that two hours to bless my family. Sure, I'd be making more money, but (and it's still hard for me to say this!) money isn't everything. What good does money do when I'm a burnt-out husk of a woman, grumping and grousing at everyone because I'm too tired to cook, hug, or talk to anyone?
That is not my Best Yes.
For me, the Best Yes was to keep the hours I had already established, make a little less and budget smarter. Both God and I would be happier that way. And happy people bless others.
Your Best Yes might be different. Asking God to help you and discerning what is the Best Yes for you and your family can keep you from doing too much, or blessing others more. All the while keeping yourself sane.
And sane is a good thing. I tried it once!