Resist, Repent, Repeat!

How many times have we asked for an answer to prayer, got it, then completely disobeyed?

*raises both hands and right leg*

A few years ago, I asked for an Answer and He gave me one. Write books. Write all of them. Simple and direct, right? But did I heed God's will? 

Nope.

Instead, this past year was a wash. I did nothing. Nada. Nicht. Nothing. In fact, I barely wrote at all!

I did the exact opposite of what He wanted. If I'd done what He asked, I'd probably have two books out by now, and several in the works- maybe even a few puzzle and coloring books too.

If I had listened. 
But I didn't.

Maybe you've done the same thing. Oh, not quite as long as me perhaps, but something similar. And the guilt weighs on your heart like a sleeping walrus. A really well-fed and exhausted Alpha walrus.

Now what? 

Resist. Stop doing what you're not supposed to do, and start doing what you are supposed to do. Stop dwelling on past blunders and focus on the future- and if that's too overwhelming, focus on today. Don't allow yourself distractions. Close the door. Put on ear muffs. Turn off the computer or phone. Walk away. If the temptation God-friendly and can be used as a reward, go for it. Just be aware that it's a reward, not the focus of your goal!

Ask God for the strength of mind, will, and body to resist going back into bad habits and temptations.

Repent. Alleviate the guilt you're feeling by talking with God. He's an easy-going fellah most of the time, and when we come to Him with a repentant heart, He's always willing to listen. Tell Him your frustrations and that you're sorry- but don't give excuses or say you'll never do it again. You both know better. Do that and any slip-up will only result in more guilt, not progress. Don't ask me how I know.

Give up the guilt to God. He can handle it!

Now focus on what God told you to do, and do it.

And if you slip up again?

Repeat. Start at Resist and keep going until you're back on track once more. It's much easier the second time (not to mention the tenth time..ugh), and you'll get better at staying on track until you're stellar at doing what God wants you to do.

Like writing books. (hint hint to self)

I've wallowed long enough. No more Jabbas or walruses for me- at least for now! Today I'm resisting and repenting. Then I'll be writing those books, and creating puzzles, and coloring pages...and anything else God wants because my heart won't have flipper-prints anymore.

I hope this inspires you to do the same.

Resist, Repent, Repeat. Onward and upward- fully focused!

The Year of Jabba

Happy New Year!

I spent New Years' morning looking at all of the posts people made about what they did the previous year. Some had great family moments. Some lost loved ones. Others had accomplished major goals, and others a few minor ones.

So I took a trip down memory lane into my past year. 

Hoo boy.

At the beginning of last year, I was recovering from a hysterectomy. I kept overdoing it, sending my poor, sore self back on the recliner for another few weeks. A six-week recovery took more than twelve weeks. Three months of just lying there, doing nothing.

It was the Year of Jabba for me. Jabba as in Jabba the Hutt. That oversized, dictator slug in those Star Wars movies. I'd gained 70 pounds, lost most of the strength in my core muscles, and my mobility was about as good as the SlugFather. 

That wasn't the plan. I was going to write my heart out during my recovery but found that laptops don't work well when you're laying down. Seventy extra pounds made it hard to sit at my writing desk- the drawer handle at the top pressed against my still-healing scars. 
Eventually, I started to like binge-watching Netflix and being waited upon by my family. So...

I stopped writing. 
I stopped ministry.
I stopped blogging.
I stopped crafting.
I stopped living.

Even my muse (who never shuts up) went on vacation and didn't come back until a few weeks ago. Maybe it was depression. Maybe it was (and is) the pain I'm in from the weight gain and back spasms from core muscle loss. 

And now it's 2019. Time to put the Year of Jabba behind me.

I still hurt, but I'm working through it slowly so I can stand longer than a few minutes. I've managed to walk through Sam's Club instead of using the motorized carts (as long as I had a short shopping list). Though I'll be honest here, I like those little carts! It's so fun driving down the aisles announcing 'Watch the tram car please!' and see who gets out of the way without even looking. You know who you are, New Jersey shore people!

I've also started putting together my own version of a bullet journal. Mine is a small binder that I'm filling with my own printable journal sheets, and though I was hoping to have it finished by the new year, I almost have it completed.

And now, here I am blogging once more. I'm so sorry you had to wait so long for me to get my Schmidt together!

Things are still in flux around family life- we're currently looking at minimalist videos to see where we can cut costs, get rid of clutter, and just think a little differently concerning simpler living. Both kids should be out of the house within the next few years so we won't need as much stuff- or space. 

There's a lot to think about. And plan for.

I'm probably not going to get everything on my To-Do lists done but I do plan on conquering most of the things listed.

No, I'm not telling you what those things are. But you can celebrate with me when they happen!

Maybe I'll dub this year the Year of the Tortoise. Not just any regular old reptile, but the one that beat out the hare in the fairy tale. Slow and steady progress is still progress, and with God's help, I intend to win the race!