What Does He Really Want Me To Do?

I often find myself wondering what God wants. He moves me in a certain direction, then it seems like He blocks my path. Then I wonder if I was going the wrong way in the first place, and maybe I just read His hints wrong.

So what does He really want me to do? Or is He just messing with my head?

I believe that God does have a great sense of humor- after all, when Darwin had his "big idea" on evolution, God showed him a platypus- but I don't think He messes with us to just mess with us- He's trying to teach us something.

For instance, say He wants me to go to point B. Now He knows I'll resist going to point B because I'm stubborn, so He decides that instead of knocking me over the head with a brick and bestowing His wisdom on me, the lesson might stick better if I go to point A first- even if point A isn't where He really wants me to be. I follow him happily to point A, and when I'm almost there, He changes the direction by blocking the pathway to point A. I can see it, but I can't get there. So I look for another route.

Guess where He's going to send me?

I go to point B, thinking it's a rest stop, then find out this is way cooler that point A ever was. Which is exactly where God wants me. And I'm none the wiser, foolish mortal that I am.

Sometimes the blockage is a redirection, but sometimes it's a test. Let's say He really wants me at point A. I follow happily, but then there's that blockade again. But He leaves a crack in the blockade. I can see the light shining through, and as I look around, I find a hammer and a chisel. He gives me a way to get to the goal, He just makes me work for it. God doesn't usually just hand us stuff without working for it, you know. We'd get spoiled, and He doesn't want brats in His kingdom.

Often I misread where He wants me to be. He wants me to be at point B, but I see A and C and go my own way, thinking that's where He wants me. Then I dig in and don't want to come out. Something big has to happen before I'll move. So there. Nyah.

It's a good thing God is patient. He's also good at doing big things to dislodge thick-headed boobs from their hidey-holes.

I'm still not quite sure where He wants me yet, but I've learned this- if there's a blockage, I look for the right tools to break through. If there isn't a way out (that God has provided or hasn't shown me yet), then I look for another path. Instead of pummeling the walls of the blockade, I save my strength for the journey ahead, trying (but not always succeeding) to see where He is leading me. I know He'll get me there eventually!

Baby Box Steps

I've finally done it.

I made my very first video.

Even better, this video was shown exclusively at the Colorado Writer's Conference this past weekend!

And now that the conference is over, I can share it with YOU!

Here's the link to the video:

Pastor Peter Lundell's Video

Please feel free to like, follow, share, promote, or do whatever it is you like doing to help a gal out!

I have to tell you- this was one of the hardest things for me to do. I love hamming it up, but I've never done it in front of more than five people, and never in front of a camera (home movies don't count!) This venture took me to a fear factor somewhere between bed-wetting and a near-death experience- I was just glad I didn't need a mop after taping!

Oh, I know it's no end-all-be-all-viral-video-of-the-universe, but after only three takes, I'm quite happy with the results.The best thing is I'll improve as I go along, and you will be along for the ride as God molds me into what He wants. Hopefully my presence will be perfected online, despite me flubbing slightly on that particular lyric!

I'm learning to step out of my box with baby steps. Who knows where this will take me?

And will I need to carry a mop along the way?

Big Blessings in Little Packages

I never put much thought into the little everyday things I do. As a housewife, my day includes a lot of small tasks that don't seem significant at the time, but produce big results- sometimes in unexpected ways.

Not in the way of family appreciation- I no longer wait for that particular train to arrive- but in a sense of accomplishment because I know I did a good job. Oh my family appreciates me, but how they express it varies:

I know I've made a good meal when dinnertime is quiet and the pans are empty. 

I know I've kept up on straightening when no one breaks a leg when walking in the living room.

I know I've kept up on cleaning by the lack of comments about Buick-sized dust bunnies rolling about like domestic tumbleweeds across the vast expanses of the carpet.

Silence, is indeed, golden.

I used to think no one cared- now I know they don't- unless something goes wrong. Only then do I hear about it. So I've learned that a quiet house is a happy house.

Just because no one notices the little things I do doesn't mean these chores are worthless. Wiping off a counter or doing the dishes does bless the family as a whole, as well as making sure everyone has good food in their bellies and clean clothes- though my son could care less about the latter, I save millions of lives each day from "Toxic Boy Stench" by making him wear the clean stuff every morning.

You're welcome.

Picking up shoes and folding throws on the couch isn't a glorious job- it's a glorified one. It's not always easy, or fun, or stress-free, but it's a job that has more benefits than any other job I've ever had. And I've had a lot.

My job makes my family happy, therefore making God happy. And I really want to make God happy- I don't want to be responsible for making Him grumpy. Ever. 

God knows what I do is important- I'm the one that tends to forget that fact. So I make posts like these to remind myself and hopefully bless others.

Little chores add up to big blessings- just like a house can only be built one brick at a time!

Repurposing...Life!

I've always liked repurposing things. You can change it's original use, or just make whatever-it-is look nicer and therefore more valuable- even if the value is sentimental.

This past few months have been tough. There's more month than money most times, and the house seems more messy and chaotic than usual. I've been trying to "fix" things, only to get myself in deeper chaos.
I decided to re-read a really great book, Passionate Housewives Desperate for God. I wasn't through a third of the book before I realized where I went wrong.

I wasn't being a homemaker, I was trying to run my house as a business. I was a boss instead of a wife and mother. Oh I'm still the boss concerning my kids, home care and menus (yet the cats still see me as staff), but what I was doing wasn't honoring my husband or my house. My priorities were all wrong. Yes- the Proverbs 31 woman sells items she makes out of her home, but her husband, children and home should be the top three on her list.

But they certainly weren't on mine.

It was time to repurpose my life.

Today starts with a fresh perspective, a clean slate, and the right attitude. Instead of modifying and tweaking and trying to fix my broken schedules and routines, I'm going to take everything back down "to formula"- this means scrapping the old schedules and taking what hours I have in my day to plan things the way God intended- and only doing business when everything else is done.

I look around my home and find it strangely sparse of any beauty. It's been a year-and-a-half since we moved here, and I still don't have curtains up, and very few pictures on the walls. I'm a quilter, a crafter, as well as cook and homemaker, yet all those little decorative ideas I've had haven't come to fruition. 
It's not about decorating the house- it's about making the home welcoming to those that come to visit, and a place of rest and comfort when my husband comes home from work.

We are a very welcoming family, but our house doesn't reflect that with its bare walls and windows.

I've also had ideas for decorating our church, which is also bare of decor since it moved several years ago. I've gotten approval for making art for the walls, but never completed anything- all I have are sketches and notes scribbled in a folder. 

All because I went askew of my real purpose. 

The kids won't live here forever (I hope), and I can always focus on the business aspect when we're empty-nesters.  Business won't be my main focus. I expect some backsliding, only because I know my own nature; but as long as I get back on track and grow in His will, that's all that really matters!