Monday, May 11, 2015

To Do Or Not To Do? That Is The Problem!

My brain has officially stopped functioning on an intelligent level. I can eat (and eat, and eat), brush my hair, and do all the necessary body maintenance, but when it comes to doing anything productive, my brain has gone on vacation.

I'm in "information overload".

I wrote a book. I asked advice on what to do next. Self or traditional publishing? Little did I know I opened the writers 'Pandora's box'. I was overwhelmed with responses containing so much information, there was no way I could have it all read and processed in a month and come to a reasonable decision. Instead of having a better Idea of what I wanted, I'm more confused than ever.

I have a small platform. I have a blog, website, Facebook and Twitter accounts. I post once a week, and hope my posts reach enough people to make the world a happier place. So I started looking into promoting myself, and got slammed with even more information than I did publishing!

There's a lot of information on the internet. That's good, but it's also bad. Reading about everything on the subject used to mean a library book (if you were lucky to find even one on an unpopular subject), writing down the pros and cons, then making a decision. Now the pros and cons list is so long I'd be endangering trees if I wrote it all down on paper. I need a pros and cons list for my pros and cons list!

My poor tortured brain made the decision for me. it took a hike. I can now concentrate only on dripping faucets, chirping birds, and wall paint. We have nice wall paint here.

I should take a sabbatical from the internet. But that poses it's own problems. When I get back, I'd have to play catch-up on everything- emails, posts, and messages. I'd be overwhelmed once more and this time, my brain might not come back.

But not taking a break could do the same thing! I really need to find a happy medium here. Like a vacation. But I know better. I haven't been on vacation since my honeymoon eighteen years ago.

Maybe take a day off from the house. Get out. Get perspective. Maybe find a cabin in the woods for the weekend to recharge the old batteries. Then when I come home I'll have a better perspective. At least after i catch up on emails and Facebook posts. 

Sigh.

The good thing is I'm running a charity event for a local recreation center. I can focus on that and leave the other stuff behind for a while. No more reading posts of platforms or publishing- at least this week. Maybe I can clear my mind before the event is over this weekend.

One blessing God bestowed upon me was meeting several authors at an impromptu book signing this past weekend. I spoke with the authors- a mixed bag of genres as well as self and traditionally published books- and I learned a lot. I really enjoyed speaking with the self-publishing guy. He was open, honest, and had no problem telling me the harsh truths and trails of being self-published, and what it takes. He had a lot of good information. I took his card and several others. Something to think about this week.

To do or not to do? That really is the question. I hate the snails' pace I'm going right now, but that might just be the pace God wants me to go. A big part of me keeps scheming for ways to make a quick buck, but that's not always the best way, dagnabbit.

Prayer has helped a lot. Just sitting outside, clearing my mind and asking God "Now what?" after telling Him my troubles, then sitting back and listening for an answer. Sometimes I don't get one. I hear the birds chirping, or the wind caresses my face, and I just sigh and let His peace flow over me. Sometimes that's all that's needed to clear the cobwebs.

To do or not to do? I still don't know. But with prayer and answer comes closer each day. I feel it in my bones- an undercurrent of possibilities that can take me anywhere God wants me to go. Wherever that is. But the idea is clearer each day and that's comforting.

I just hope my brain comes back before I get my answer!

1 comments:

Beth Brubaker said...

@rahmi fadhli

Translation: I am from Indonesia .. Greetings yah .. good luck :)

Thank you so much Rahmi!

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